Posts Tagged ‘failures’

A rickety ride

Monday, September 28th, 2009

Today is Yom Kippur, one of the few Jewish holidays I observe to some degree, by fasting to atone for my sins. This is a good year for it, regrettably.

In the words of my good friend Richard, life is a sine wave, and the past couple of weeks have certainly been a rickety ride across its peaks and troughs. I’m happy to say that things have in the aggregate been quite positive and I’ve been far luckier than I’ve deserved, but there’s been a lot of sadness and hurt I’ve been responsible for, and some tough stuff I’ve had to come to terms with. Things are broken that I simply cannot fix, and it gnaws at me that I’m capable of causing such damage and be utterly helpless to make amends for it. I will continue to be there for them and hope for the opportunity to someday offer them some peace of mind, but I’ve no reason to expect they will ever be receptive to it.

If that wasn’t cryptic enough, there’s still a huge ream of stuff coming down the pipe I simply can’t talk about yet. It’s one of the reasons I don’t post to this blog very often lately… I’ve been thinking that it will be resolved any day now for over two months, and I can end with the secrecy. Frustration!

Cannibal opens on Friday, and we only have two or three rehearsals between then and now. I don’t know how ready I feel. I think the show will be okay for what it is… I’m actually mostly concerned about my recorder music, some of which I only received yesterday and I don’t know if I’ll have time to learn it well enough for the show. I’m still excited by the prospect of playing a recorder on stage for the first time since I was in elementary school, though.

My sleep has been mired by a cold I had last week… it was mercifully brief but has still left me more ragged than normal. I’ve started irrigating my nasal passages with a neti pot, which is something I’ve been meaning to try for years, as I know nasal irrigation has worked wonders for my dad. I think I’m starting to get some positive effects from it, but it’s tough to tell. Mostly I just constantly feel like I’ve come home from swimming.

Dan.

The puppet and the puppeteer

Friday, June 19th, 2009

In improv we sometimes talk about the puppet and the puppeteer, where the puppet is the character you’re playing on stage, alive and in the moment, and the puppeteer is the actor part of your brain, subtly pulling the strings from up above the scene, where you have a broader view of the story and where it’s going, its characters and relationships. This concept has translated pretty much directly for me to scripted work… one director I worked with was fond of the expression “do that thinking actor thing”, and that’s worked its way into my own vernacular.

Tonight’s performance of Fiddler was probably the worst I’ve had so far in the run. Other than borking the end of my song (something I’ve managed not to do since preview night), both the puppet and the puppeteer were completely on the fritz. My reactions all felt forced and insincere, and most of them came either a moment early or late… I even caught myself telegraphing, something I almost never do. Buh.

We’ve got two more performances, tomorrow and Sunday. I’m going to be working tomorrow as well, as we are in mega-crunch mode on my project. They’ve blocked off traffic on the street on my office, though, as there is a Solstice Parade with naked bicyclists who will be going through there. Should be interesting to try to get stuff done.

All this week has been the International Festival at Unexpected Productions. Between work and theatre I haven’t been able to attend, but I made it out last Sunday to the opening night barbecue, which was really interesting as it took place at a legitimate mansion, the kind I had no idea existed in Seattle.

The story behind it is that a divorced couple haven’t been able to sell it for the past two years or so, and about ten friends who are part of an improv/film ensemble found it on Craigslist and decided to rent it at about $6 thousand a month. The place is an incredible tribute to excess, boasting such features as a swimming pool/jaccuzzi with a retractable roof, a giant koi pond, a movie-theatre style projector screening room, a whole roof patio, a full second floor bar/lounge with a grand piano, an incredible ivy-covered gazebo, a walk-in wine cellar, a full-sized kids’ climbing playground with swings and slides, an outdoor pizza oven, and a barbecue that’s so large it has a fridge inside it. I felt like I was in an episode of Entourage.

Probably the best feature, though, is that it’s directly overlooking Puget Sound, with a view of the water from every level that’s worth a million dollars on its own.

I spent most of the evening flipping burgers for people, as I was incredibly hungry when I got there and it seemed if I didn’t then there would be no food for anyone. It was still a great time.

I will be very glad when my project at work wraps. It’s been late nights every night this week; yesterday I didn’t get home until close to midnight. It doesn’t help that there are all sorts of traffic conundrums, such as the 520 bridge opening last night (something that’s never happened to me before), stalling me from getting home for about an additional 20 minutes. The bridge is closed all weekend so I’m going to have to detour around the lake, not to mention the parade and the naked cyclists.

A breather will be welcome…

Dan.